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[Mary Alice]
Previously on Desperate Housewives.
2
00:00:02,166 --> 00:00:04,000
We had an agreement to keep things casual.
3
00:00:04,083 --> 00:00:06,333
Susan made her feelings clear.
4
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So, if I was with another woman,
that wouldn't bother you?
5
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No, it wouldn't.
6
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You want to work here?
7
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I'm great with food,
I understand business...
8
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Bree made Orson a partner.
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Is she still asking you questions
about me?
10
00:00:18,208 --> 00:00:19,166
A few.
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And Dave took steps to get
Karen McCluskey out of the way.
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You think you can screw with me?
13
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[all shrieking]
14
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-[Edie] Karen!
-Let's not be doing that.
15
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As a masseur for
the Fairview Country Club,
16
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Carlos Solis had become an expert
on how to make women happy.
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That's why he always had scented
candles waiting for Sue Bridges,
18
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New Age music for Betsy Daniel
19
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and apple schnapps for Shannon Glenn.
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Yes, Carlos had made
a lot of women happy over the years,
21
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but on one very unusual
Wednesday afternoon
22
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he made Mrs. Virginia Hildebrand
a little happier
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than he intended.
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Helen said your last reservation
just canceled.
25
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-You want a ride home?
-Thanks, Clay. That'd be great.
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Can I ask you something?
27
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How long you been a masseur?
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Fourteen years.
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Okay. And in all those years,
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have you ever accidentally given a woman
31
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an orgasm?
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-An orgasm?
-Keep your voice down.
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You want to get me fired?
34
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How do you accidentally
give a woman an orgasm?
35
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I don't know.
36
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I can barely give my girlfriend one,
and I try really hard.
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All I did was touch her back.
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Are you sure?
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Some of these old broads,
their bodies drop.
40
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Not everything is
where it's supposed to be.
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I may be blind,
but my sense of touch is just fine.
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Well, then maybe she just really liked
the massage.
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You wouldn't believe the moaners
I get on my table.
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I'm telling you, her body was quivering.
She could barely breathe.
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All right, well,
there is one sure-fire way to find out.
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-Where's your tip envelope?
-On the counter.
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So how much did she leave me?
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Enough for two orgasms.
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[Mary Alice] Yes, Carlos Solis was
an expert on how to make women happy.
50
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I'm about to go get groceries.
Where are your tips?
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Oh, my God! How did you get so much?
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And he knew the best way
to keep his wife happy...
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Just good at my job.
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Well...
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...was to lie.
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[theme music playing]
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[theme music ends]
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[Mary Alice] There are
dangerous women in this world,
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devious predators waiting to strike.
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You can spot them
by the lipstick they use,
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the shoes they wear
and the perfume they choose.
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But the easiest way
to spot a dangerous woman
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is to see how she behaves...
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I am about to make you so happy.
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...with another woman's husband.
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Amy, don't worry about the lunch specials.
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I'm only two blocks away.
I'll take care of it once I...
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Actually, you do them.
I'm going to be a while.
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[Lynette] Tom?
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Lynette, hey.
What, what are you doing here?
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So funny. I was going to ask you
the same question,
72
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but I was going to start with
"What the hell?"
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You remember Anne, right? Anne Schilling?
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Kirby's mom. We were room parents
together in the third grade.
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Right. So, what the hell?
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Tom, why don't we just show her?
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It's for my band!
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Anne has been helping us find
a rehearsal space.
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Oh! That's right. You're a realtor.
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Now, I know what you're thinking.
It seems like a waste of money...
81
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But I just got them to reduce the rent
and throw in the utilities.
82
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And you're always complaining
about the noise
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when we practice in the garage.
So, you know...
84
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what do you think?
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I think it's great.
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-You do?
-Yeah.
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[all laughing]
88
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Wonderful. Listen,
I have to be somewhere by 10:00.
89
00:05:08,959 --> 00:05:12,291
So why don't we sign the lease right now?
90
00:05:12,375 --> 00:05:16,500
Wow. I was convinced that
you would think it was a dumb idea.
91
00:05:16,583 --> 00:05:20,917
Well, it's a little dumb,
but compared to what I was thinking...
92
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What were you thinking?
93
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Well, it's just...
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I saw you two together, I...
I didn't know that you were...
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And she looks so...
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For God's sakes, Tom,
the woman has to be somewhere.
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Just sign the damn lease.
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So out of nowhere, Jackson says,
"Let's move in together."
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I mean, of course I was stunned,
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and then when I said no,
he just broke up with me.
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I mean, does he really expect me
to be in love after just five months?
102
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-That's crazy.
-Yeah, I guess.
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Although his work on these moldings
is amazing.
104
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You really want me
to repaint these, Suzanne?
105
00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:02,959
It's Susan.
106
00:06:03,041 --> 00:06:05,667
And he was the first one to say
he didn't want to get serious,
107
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which is why I was happy.
We were just having fun.
108
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Well, maybe you should call him.
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-How do you like this color?
-Not so much.
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Frank, how can I call him?
He's the one that ended it with me.
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All right, the guy makes you happy.
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He says he loves you.
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You're gonna let pride stop you from
finding out where this thing could go?
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Come on. Don't be stupid.
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[sighs]
116
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-How much am I paying you?
-$14 an hour.
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It's not enough.
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No, ma'am. It's not.
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[wind chimes chiming]
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Carlos, what are you doing home?
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Virginia insisted on giving me a ride.
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You must be Gabrielle.
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Carlos has told me so much about you.
I'm Virginia Hildebrand.
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Oh, You are the Mrs. Hildebrand.
Well, you're Carlos' favorite client!
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Well, mine, anyway. I bought this top
with that crazy tip you gave him.
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Your Carlos has helped my back problems
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like no masseur I've ever had.
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I'm pain free for the first time in years.
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That's Carlos for you, Mr. Magic Hands.
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He hits the old sweet spot every time.
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Okay, Gabby.
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I should go now,
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but promise you'll at least consider
my little proposal.
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What proposal?
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I hate to stop
when we're making so much progress,
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but I need to go to Europe for two months,
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mostly London and Rome.
I'd be so grateful if Carlos
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would accompany me as my personal masseur.
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Two whole months?
140
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See, I told you. It's too long,
and Gabby has the girls and...
141
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I know it's a lot to ask,
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which is why I'm offering Carlos $50,000.
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-$50,000?
-Per month.
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-Well, pip-pip and arrivederci!
-Gabby.
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-I'll leave you two to discuss it.
-Well, what's to discuss?
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For that kind of money,
you can lock him in a cage
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and feed him peanuts.
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I'll see you tomorrow, Carlos.
Lovely meeting you, Gabby.
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Carlos, don't even think
about saying no to this!
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00:08:18,333 --> 00:08:20,959
She is not my only client.
I'll be letting down the rest if I go.
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Mr. Banks could even fire me.
152
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Don't worry about Mr. Banks.
I'll take care of him.
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-Gabby.
-And so what if he fires you?
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Once Virginia tells all of her rich
lady friends about what you did for her,
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they'll be lining up around the block.
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Great.
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[door opens]
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[Orson] Hey, great news.
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I just got a call from my old friend,
Peter Hickey.
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I don't recall ever hearing
that name before.
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He's a friend from college.
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Anyway, he mentioned that his parents'
50th anniversary was next month,
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and I convinced him to let us cater it.
Dinner for 80.
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-Eighty?
-He shoots, he scores!
165
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Orson, you are amazing.
166
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Oh! One week on the job
167
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and he's already
bringing in huge accounts.
168
00:09:08,041 --> 00:09:09,458
Mmm-hmm. That's great.
169
00:09:10,166 --> 00:09:13,583
Well, I'd better go marinate
those scallops for the lunch tomorrow.
170
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Oh, scallops? Done.
171
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-Done?
-Hmm.
172
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I also made the pesto mayonnaise,
173
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and I put the individual cobblers
in their ramekins.
174
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Oh, well, it looks like we're all set
until the morning, then.
175
00:09:25,458 --> 00:09:27,500
Hey, why don't you take the afternoon off?
176
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And do what?
177
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I don't know.
Read, relax, give yourself a pedicure.
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Fine.
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What do you bet I take my socks off
180
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and see that Orson's
already done it for me?
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[door slams shut]
182
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-What are you doing?
-The refrigerator needs cleaning.
183
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No, it doesn't.
184
00:09:52,166 --> 00:09:55,792
And besides, I gave you the day off.
Now go home.
185
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I'm thinking about moving to Maryland.
186
00:09:59,500 --> 00:10:00,834
-Maryland?
-Mmm-hmm.
187
00:10:01,417 --> 00:10:04,125
Dylan's there with her husband,
and the baby's coming soon.
188
00:10:04,375 --> 00:10:06,291
Maybe it's time for me to go
inflict myself on them.
189
00:10:06,375 --> 00:10:09,041
You can't just up and move.
You have a life here.
190
00:10:09,125 --> 00:10:11,917
No, I don't. I have a job, period.
191
00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:15,125
No kids to raise.
No husband. No boyfriend.
192
00:10:15,208 --> 00:10:18,500
I might as well throw in the towel
and go be a grandma.
193
00:10:19,250 --> 00:10:22,542
Katherine, you are a vibrant,
attractive woman.
194
00:10:22,625 --> 00:10:26,625
Who hasn't had sex in two years.
That spells grandma to me.
195
00:10:30,500 --> 00:10:32,917
I haven't made up my mind yet.
Just let me think about it,
196
00:10:33,834 --> 00:10:35,625
and help keep me busy.
197
00:10:37,500 --> 00:10:38,417
When you're done with that,
198
00:10:38,500 --> 00:10:40,542
the oven could use
a really good scrubbing.
199
00:10:40,625 --> 00:10:42,000
Bless you.
200
00:10:48,041 --> 00:10:49,041
Karen?
201
00:10:50,834 --> 00:10:53,917
Oh! Those must have set you back a chunk.
202
00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:57,917
Yes, they did. Not that you deserve them.
203
00:10:59,041 --> 00:11:00,917
I don't blame you for being mad.
204
00:11:02,333 --> 00:11:06,000
I'm not mad. I'm furious.
205
00:11:06,667 --> 00:11:10,542
And what the hell were you thinking
coming at my husband with a baseball bat?
206
00:11:10,625 --> 00:11:13,291
I know. I'm really sorry, Edie.
207
00:11:13,375 --> 00:11:16,834
The doctor had me on these new meds,
and it made me loopy.
208
00:11:16,917 --> 00:11:18,750
I thought Dave was messing with my head,
209
00:11:18,834 --> 00:11:21,250
and all the time it was the damn pills.
210
00:11:21,667 --> 00:11:23,166
Well, I hope you stopped taking them.
211
00:11:23,250 --> 00:11:26,750
You bet.
Had to get my marbles back. [chuckles]
212
00:11:28,500 --> 00:11:32,000
Look, I know you just got here,
but I am so sleepy, and...
213
00:11:32,083 --> 00:11:34,959
Of course. I'll see you when you get home.
214
00:11:39,709 --> 00:11:41,375
Actually, I'm gonna call my sister
215
00:11:41,458 --> 00:11:43,083
and see if I can stay with her
for a while.
216
00:11:43,166 --> 00:11:45,750
I don't think I should be
on my own just yet.
217
00:11:46,333 --> 00:11:49,250
Okay. Then I'll see you whenever.
218
00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:53,458
Be sure and tell Dave how sorry I am.
219
00:11:54,542 --> 00:11:58,458
He will be so glad.
He's really fond of you, you know.
220
00:12:07,250 --> 00:12:08,208
[speed dail]
221
00:12:08,291 --> 00:12:09,959
Come on, come on, come on.
222
00:12:10,834 --> 00:12:12,583
Hey, Sis, it's Karen.
223
00:12:12,667 --> 00:12:16,542
Do me a favor and get your sorry ass over
to Fairview Memorial Hospital, ASAP.
224
00:12:17,125 --> 00:12:19,041
I need you big time, kiddo.
225
00:12:24,166 --> 00:12:25,166
[knocking at door]
226
00:12:25,250 --> 00:12:26,583
Come in.
227
00:12:28,583 --> 00:12:30,875
Hi, I'm looking for Orson Hodge.
I'm Peter Hickey.
228
00:12:31,417 --> 00:12:34,750
Oh, yes, of course. I'm his wife, Bree.
229
00:12:34,834 --> 00:12:37,875
I'm afraid he's out running errands,
but he's told me all about you.
230
00:12:37,959 --> 00:12:38,875
Oh?
231
00:12:38,959 --> 00:12:42,041
Yes, he said you were roommates
back in college.
232
00:12:42,834 --> 00:12:44,375
Yes, we were.
233
00:12:44,458 --> 00:12:45,583
Have a seat.
234
00:12:45,667 --> 00:12:48,375
Anyway, my parents'
50th anniversary is coming up,
235
00:12:48,458 --> 00:12:51,083
and I thought I'd surprise them
with a family reunion.
236
00:12:51,166 --> 00:12:53,208
What a thoughtful son you are.
237
00:13:00,875 --> 00:13:04,375
So, have you given any thought
to the venue?
238
00:13:04,458 --> 00:13:07,083
Uh, yes. I have a summer place up
on Lake Pleasant.
239
00:13:07,166 --> 00:13:09,083
I'm pretty sure the terrace fits
eight tables of 10.
240
00:13:09,583 --> 00:13:11,792
My, that's a nice little terrace.
241
00:13:11,875 --> 00:13:14,417
Well, we will throw you a party so special
242
00:13:14,500 --> 00:13:17,291
that you'll want us
to cater your anniversary, too.
243
00:13:17,917 --> 00:13:19,250
Actually, I'm not married.
244
00:13:20,500 --> 00:13:21,500
Oh. [chuckles]
245
00:13:23,417 --> 00:13:25,750
Well, let's talk about food.
246
00:13:25,834 --> 00:13:28,959
With a new client, what I usually do
is discuss possible menus,
247
00:13:29,041 --> 00:13:34,041
and then I have my very best chef
prepare a sample dinner.
248
00:13:34,500 --> 00:13:38,917
Sample dinner? We don't do sample dinners.
249
00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:42,375
But this is Orson's college roommate,
250
00:13:42,792 --> 00:13:45,333
and he's quite the catch.
251
00:13:45,959 --> 00:13:49,375
Oh, wait a minute, is this a set-up?
Because I loathe blind dates.
252
00:13:49,458 --> 00:13:50,500
Well, that's what's so great about it.
253
00:13:50,583 --> 00:13:52,375
Technically, it's a business dinner.
254
00:13:52,458 --> 00:13:54,625
It has all the potential upside of a date,
255
00:13:54,709 --> 00:13:57,083
while still being tax deductible.
256
00:13:58,458 --> 00:14:00,792
Fine. I will cook for the man,
257
00:14:00,875 --> 00:14:02,667
but I'm not going to get dressed up,
258
00:14:02,750 --> 00:14:06,041
I'm not going to put on make-up,
and I'm not going to flirt.
259
00:14:06,667 --> 00:14:08,542
He came while Orson was out.
260
00:14:08,625 --> 00:14:10,875
I let him record a message on my phone.
261
00:14:14,375 --> 00:14:18,166
Orson, sorry I missed you, buddy.
Catch you next time, okay?
262
00:14:18,250 --> 00:14:19,250
[beep]
263
00:14:19,750 --> 00:14:21,333
You realize you could have just
led with this
264
00:14:21,417 --> 00:14:23,000
and saved us this whole discussion.
265
00:14:26,709 --> 00:14:28,667
[coughs]
266
00:14:28,750 --> 00:14:30,834
Jeez, Roberta.
267
00:14:32,250 --> 00:14:35,000
Put that damn thing out.
You're not in a corner saloon.
268
00:14:35,583 --> 00:14:37,583
Then how come there's bourbon
in my coffee?
269
00:14:37,667 --> 00:14:39,458
Do I have to call the nurse?
270
00:14:39,542 --> 00:14:41,583
Fine. I drove 80 miles to see you, Karen.
271
00:14:41,667 --> 00:14:43,792
You better be dying
or you're gonna pay for my gas.
272
00:14:43,875 --> 00:14:47,083
I'm not dying, but there's someone
who sure wishes I was.
273
00:14:47,166 --> 00:14:48,959
Son of a bitch landed me in here.
274
00:14:49,959 --> 00:14:52,583
You tell me where to find him,
I'll clean his damn clock.
275
00:14:53,125 --> 00:14:55,959
No, we've got to be careful
with this guy. He's dangerous.
276
00:14:57,208 --> 00:14:59,375
That's what you said
about that biker in Florida
277
00:14:59,458 --> 00:15:01,417
who now has to purée all his food.
278
00:15:03,083 --> 00:15:06,709
Nearly forgot about him.
That was a fun vacation.
279
00:15:07,208 --> 00:15:08,834
[both snickering]
280
00:15:08,875 --> 00:15:10,250
So what do you need me to do?
281
00:15:10,333 --> 00:15:13,000
Let me come stay with you
when I get out of here.
282
00:15:13,083 --> 00:15:15,792
This guy thinks I'm out of commission,
and I want to keep it that way.
283
00:15:15,875 --> 00:15:17,834
And you can help me do some digging.
284
00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:20,208
You still work for
that cell phone company? The...
285
00:15:20,291 --> 00:15:22,959
Teleshore. Yes, God help me.
286
00:15:23,041 --> 00:15:26,041
Good. Pull his records
and see what turns up.
287
00:15:26,125 --> 00:15:27,500
The name's Dave Williams.
288
00:15:27,583 --> 00:15:29,291
How do you know he's with Teleshore?
289
00:15:29,375 --> 00:15:31,041
I went through his mail.
290
00:15:32,875 --> 00:15:35,166
God, you remind me of Mom.
291
00:15:38,458 --> 00:15:39,792
So what else you need?
292
00:15:39,875 --> 00:15:42,542
[sighs] Could you smuggle me in
a cold brewskie?
293
00:15:47,917 --> 00:15:50,375
Boy, no one knows you like family.
294
00:16:01,250 --> 00:16:02,750
Jackson? It's me.
295
00:16:03,041 --> 00:16:04,208
-[knocking at door]
-[shower running]
296
00:16:08,542 --> 00:16:09,750
Hello?
297
00:16:16,458 --> 00:16:17,959
That'll work.
298
00:16:40,959 --> 00:16:43,250
[screaming]
299
00:16:46,792 --> 00:16:48,583
-[screaming]
-[grunts]
300
00:16:48,667 --> 00:16:49,667
[groans]
301
00:16:59,792 --> 00:17:02,625
-Are you okay?
-I think so.
302
00:17:03,792 --> 00:17:04,917
Good.
303
00:17:06,291 --> 00:17:08,291
So, who the hell are you?
304
00:17:09,125 --> 00:17:11,333
Darcy. Who the hell are you?
305
00:17:11,417 --> 00:17:13,667
Susan. Jackson's girlfriend.
306
00:17:14,083 --> 00:17:17,291
He never said anything about a girlfriend
when we hooked up at the club.
307
00:17:17,750 --> 00:17:22,166
Well, when guys go slut-hunting,
they tend not to play the girlfriend card.
308
00:17:23,625 --> 00:17:25,083
Did you just call me a slut?
309
00:17:25,166 --> 00:17:27,000
You met the guy tonight,
now you're in his shower.
310
00:17:27,083 --> 00:17:28,792
I'm just doing the math.
311
00:17:28,875 --> 00:17:32,041
Got the pizza. Oh, crap.
312
00:17:32,125 --> 00:17:35,875
So, we break up and 15 minutes later
you're with someone else?
313
00:17:37,291 --> 00:17:38,709
You got over me fast.
314
00:17:38,917 --> 00:17:40,667
I'm surprised it took 15 minutes.
315
00:17:40,750 --> 00:17:42,000
Stay out of this.
316
00:17:42,083 --> 00:17:43,709
Susan, why are you here?
317
00:17:44,542 --> 00:17:46,542
I wanted to talk about our future.
318
00:17:47,208 --> 00:17:49,166
You said you didn't want a future.
319
00:17:49,250 --> 00:17:52,333
Well, I was starting to change my mind,
320
00:17:52,417 --> 00:17:56,792
and then I show up and find
five feet of lip gloss in the shower.
321
00:17:58,709 --> 00:18:01,166
I brought hot wings.
You're not getting any.
322
00:18:02,333 --> 00:18:03,583
[tapping on glass]
323
00:18:06,208 --> 00:18:07,959
Hey, what's that for?
324
00:18:08,041 --> 00:18:11,166
Well, I was going to use it
to wash down a bottle of sleeping pills
325
00:18:11,250 --> 00:18:14,375
the next time your husband's "band"
defiled another rock classic,
326
00:18:14,875 --> 00:18:16,333
but since you got them a rehearsal space,
327
00:18:16,417 --> 00:18:20,083
-I thought we could share it over ice.
-[laughing] Come on in.
328
00:18:22,333 --> 00:18:23,834
-[Lynette] Hey.
-We're taking off.
329
00:18:23,917 --> 00:18:25,792
Remember, I'm spending the night
at Kirby's house.
330
00:18:25,875 --> 00:18:27,834
Right. And, Kirby, tell your mom thanks.
331
00:18:27,917 --> 00:18:30,041
That place she found for Tom
is already paying off.
332
00:18:30,125 --> 00:18:33,250
Yeah, she said she was there yesterday
and said it was looking pretty cool.
333
00:18:34,125 --> 00:18:35,625
She was there? Why?
334
00:18:35,709 --> 00:18:38,500
She was just dropping off
some old furniture for Mr. Scavo.
335
00:18:38,583 --> 00:18:40,542
A couple chairs, lamp, futon.
336
00:18:42,250 --> 00:18:43,083
Oh!
337
00:18:44,041 --> 00:18:45,208
Well, see you tomorrow.
338
00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:48,667
-Okay. Drive safely.
-[Porter] Yeah.
339
00:18:50,750 --> 00:18:52,250
-Neat or rocks?
-Rocks.
340
00:18:54,250 --> 00:18:57,583
So, why does Tom need a bed
in his rehearsal space?
341
00:18:57,667 --> 00:19:00,375
Not a bed. A futon. Like a couch.
342
00:19:00,458 --> 00:19:03,166
-That folds out to a bed.
-What are you saying?
343
00:19:03,250 --> 00:19:06,542
Well, if it's just a couch,
why didn't Tom tell you about it?
344
00:19:06,792 --> 00:19:09,667
-How do you know he didn't?
-I don't. Did he?
345
00:19:11,625 --> 00:19:12,667
No.
346
00:19:14,792 --> 00:19:16,291
Well, good for you.
347
00:19:16,959 --> 00:19:19,709
Good for you for not worrying
about your husband's bachelor pad.
348
00:19:19,792 --> 00:19:23,417
You are not the teeniest bit paranoid,
and I say, "Brava!"
349
00:19:25,375 --> 00:19:26,583
Now why aren't we drinking?
350
00:19:28,417 --> 00:19:31,917
[band playing]
351
00:19:35,208 --> 00:19:36,250
[whoops]
352
00:19:36,333 --> 00:19:38,875
Not bad!
I mean, we are really cooking there.
353
00:19:39,375 --> 00:19:40,834
Tom, you got any beer in the fridge?
354
00:19:41,250 --> 00:19:43,000
I got nothing but beer in the fridge.
355
00:19:43,458 --> 00:19:44,834
All right, everyone, go grab a cold one.
356
00:19:44,917 --> 00:19:48,625
You earned it. You sounded great. [laughs]
357
00:19:48,709 --> 00:19:51,333
-Oh, do we blow.
-Oh, yeah.
358
00:19:51,458 --> 00:19:54,750
Not you, though. Man,
you got the heart of a real blues guy.
359
00:19:54,834 --> 00:19:57,125
Well, that's what five years in prison
will do to you.
360
00:19:57,291 --> 00:19:58,667
Oh, yeah, I heard about that.
361
00:19:59,667 --> 00:20:03,583
-Still, it's fun, isn't it?
-Highlight of my week.
362
00:20:04,834 --> 00:20:06,792
You know, I was thinking
363
00:20:06,875 --> 00:20:08,542
maybe we should bump up
our rehearsal schedule,
364
00:20:08,625 --> 00:20:10,000
you know, to start working the kinks out.
365
00:20:10,291 --> 00:20:12,083
Twice a week's about all I can handle.
366
00:20:12,166 --> 00:20:13,959
What are you doing
that's more important than this?
367
00:20:14,041 --> 00:20:17,417
Well, let's see, my job, my son.
368
00:20:18,458 --> 00:20:21,166
Also, I just met this woman.
369
00:20:21,250 --> 00:20:23,500
Oh, no, dude,
not blowing us off for a girl.
370
00:20:23,583 --> 00:20:25,125
[scoffs] Buddy,
I just started seeing her. All right?
371
00:20:25,208 --> 00:20:28,125
It's kind of important for the whole
"getting back on the horse" thing.
372
00:20:28,208 --> 00:20:30,542
Well, what about Saturday afternoon?
373
00:20:31,709 --> 00:20:34,333
I mean, come on, man,
we've got to do this.
374
00:20:34,417 --> 00:20:35,500
Why?
375
00:20:36,542 --> 00:20:39,667
You're putting a lot of time and effort
into a neighborhood garage band.
376
00:20:41,125 --> 00:20:42,583
Why is this such a big deal to you?
377
00:20:45,041 --> 00:20:48,667
It's not.
I'm just having a real good time.
378
00:20:50,208 --> 00:20:51,583
All right, boys, what do you say,
379
00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:53,792
are we going to drink beer or
are we gonna play some rock-'n'-roll?
380
00:20:55,625 --> 00:20:57,583
[phone ringing]
381
00:21:00,667 --> 00:21:02,041
-[sighs]
-[beep]
382
00:21:02,125 --> 00:21:03,500
Tom, where are you?
383
00:21:03,583 --> 00:21:06,667
Hey, babe. We just really got
into a groove at rehearsal,
384
00:21:06,750 --> 00:21:08,834
and I think we're gonna play
for a couple more hours.
385
00:21:09,375 --> 00:21:10,208
Yeah?
386
00:21:10,291 --> 00:21:11,834
Anyway, I just wanted to say
don't wait up for me.
387
00:21:11,917 --> 00:21:13,875
And I will see you in the morning, okay?
388
00:21:13,959 --> 00:21:16,166
Okay. Bye.
389
00:21:18,583 --> 00:21:19,417
[door opens]
390
00:21:19,667 --> 00:21:20,667
[men chattering]
391
00:21:29,875 --> 00:21:31,792
[video game sounds playing on tv]
392
00:21:35,041 --> 00:21:36,500
Oh, my God.
393
00:21:39,208 --> 00:21:40,041
Lynette!
394
00:21:43,041 --> 00:21:44,458
You said you were rehearsing.
395
00:21:46,250 --> 00:21:48,083
I know. I know.
396
00:21:48,166 --> 00:21:53,125
[stammering] The guys left, and I just
figured I'd hang out for a little bit.
397
00:21:53,917 --> 00:21:55,583
Why can't you do that at home?
398
00:21:57,875 --> 00:22:01,583
What the hell is this?
Are you moving out on me?
399
00:22:02,792 --> 00:22:04,583
Why would I move out?
400
00:22:05,125 --> 00:22:07,208
So you can have your affair.
401
00:22:07,291 --> 00:22:10,250
You know,
the one that follows the sports car
402
00:22:10,333 --> 00:22:13,834
and the garage band
and wanting to quit your job.
403
00:22:13,917 --> 00:22:16,625
The final stage of your mid-life crisis.
404
00:22:17,792 --> 00:22:21,417
Oh, and then when I hear Anne Schilling
405
00:22:21,500 --> 00:22:22,875
has been dropping by...
406
00:22:22,959 --> 00:22:26,583
Lynette, she had a bunch
of old crappy furniture in her garage.
407
00:22:26,667 --> 00:22:29,625
I bought it for 50 bucks.
You don't really think that...
408
00:22:33,667 --> 00:22:34,667
Okay...
409
00:22:37,208 --> 00:22:39,917
these past few months when
we've been fighting about the car
410
00:22:40,000 --> 00:22:41,250
and the road trip,
411
00:22:42,500 --> 00:22:43,333
pa--
412
00:22:43,500 --> 00:22:46,500
part of me thought that you were just
complaining to complain,
413
00:22:46,583 --> 00:22:48,709
trying to ruin my fun.
414
00:22:48,792 --> 00:22:52,500
But if it's affecting you like this,
if it's making you actually think
415
00:22:52,583 --> 00:22:54,500
that I would hurt you in that way,
416
00:22:55,875 --> 00:22:57,208
I'm done with all of this.
417
00:22:59,500 --> 00:23:02,125
-So you'll come home?
-Of course.
418
00:23:05,709 --> 00:23:07,375
[sighs]
419
00:23:14,709 --> 00:23:18,667
Let me just square all this stuff away,
okay, and then I will see you there.
420
00:23:21,542 --> 00:23:22,625
Good.
421
00:23:27,375 --> 00:23:28,625
Maybe when you come home,
422
00:23:28,750 --> 00:23:31,166
you could teach me
how to play that video game.
423
00:23:31,917 --> 00:23:34,625
-That'd be great.
-Okay.
424
00:23:37,250 --> 00:23:39,125
[door opens and closes]
425
00:23:46,834 --> 00:23:48,208
[phone ringing]
426
00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:53,709
-Hey, Clay. Is Mr. Banks around?
-Not back from lunch yet. What's up?
427
00:23:53,792 --> 00:23:57,458
I need to sweet talk him into
giving Carlos two months off.
428
00:23:57,542 --> 00:24:00,500
-You two going away somewhere?
-No, just Carlos.
429
00:24:00,583 --> 00:24:05,083
Mrs. Hildebrand's taking him to Europe
as her personal massage therapist.
430
00:24:06,375 --> 00:24:09,542
-Personal massage therapist?
-Paying him a fortune,
431
00:24:10,166 --> 00:24:11,041
but he's worth it.
432
00:24:11,125 --> 00:24:13,834
I mean, what he's done for that woman,
no one else has been able to do.
433
00:24:14,792 --> 00:24:18,542
-So, he told you about that?
-They both did.
434
00:24:18,625 --> 00:24:22,458
You should have seen the woman,
looking at Carlos, gushing like crazy.
435
00:24:22,542 --> 00:24:24,709
And you're okay with them
going away together?
436
00:24:24,792 --> 00:24:28,375
[laughs] Why should I be jealous?
The woman's, like, 60.
437
00:24:28,458 --> 00:24:31,417
If she gets off on Carlos'
magical touch, what do I care?
438
00:24:31,500 --> 00:24:33,959
[chuckles] Yeah. Wow, you're broadminded.
439
00:24:34,041 --> 00:24:37,750
If my girlfriend knew that my massages
were giving a woman orgasms,
440
00:24:37,834 --> 00:24:39,417
no matter how old she was...
441
00:24:39,500 --> 00:24:42,583
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Nobody used the "O" word.
442
00:24:44,792 --> 00:24:48,500
-He didn't mention that?
-No! He's giving her orgasms?
443
00:24:48,583 --> 00:24:49,625
Not deliberately!
444
00:24:49,709 --> 00:24:52,458
He swears he's only been doing
his standard massage.
445
00:24:52,542 --> 00:24:56,417
Oh, I bet he does. Where is he?
Is she here now?
446
00:24:56,500 --> 00:25:00,917
Oh, no, no. She prefers her place,
so she's been sending a car for him.
447
00:25:04,625 --> 00:25:05,959
Where? Where does she live?
448
00:25:06,041 --> 00:25:08,500
It's that big house on the corner
of Lake and Pinehurst.
449
00:25:08,583 --> 00:25:10,500
I'm sorry, Gabby.
Is there anything I can do?
450
00:25:11,417 --> 00:25:14,667
Well, when the time comes,
an alibi would be nice.
451
00:25:19,375 --> 00:25:20,500
[sighs]
452
00:25:20,583 --> 00:25:21,959
We need to talk.
453
00:25:22,041 --> 00:25:25,583
Sorry, bad time.
I have the mailman upstairs in my tub.
454
00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:28,083
You know what?
455
00:25:28,166 --> 00:25:31,333
-You have no right to be mad at me.
-I don't?
456
00:25:31,417 --> 00:25:33,500
I try to commit to you,
and you push me away.
457
00:25:33,542 --> 00:25:36,542
I try to move on and I'm a shallow jerk.
What the hell are you doing?
458
00:25:37,083 --> 00:25:41,333
Yeah, I have been married twice,
and both times that's imploded.
459
00:25:41,417 --> 00:25:46,375
So really, I feel like
love is not my friend.
460
00:25:46,458 --> 00:25:50,917
You know, God, I wish that I could say
it was just rotten luck, but...
461
00:25:51,750 --> 00:25:53,750
I just, I'm thinking that...
462
00:25:54,375 --> 00:25:56,375
I can't do this.
463
00:25:56,917 --> 00:25:58,166
You can't?
464
00:25:58,250 --> 00:26:01,041
I never even had a real girlfriend
before I met you. I didn't want one.
465
00:26:01,125 --> 00:26:03,333
And the first time I try to commit,
bam, I get smacked.
466
00:26:03,417 --> 00:26:05,959
Look, I don't even know
where we are any more.
467
00:26:06,917 --> 00:26:07,875
[groans]
468
00:26:07,959 --> 00:26:09,083
Wow.
469
00:26:13,375 --> 00:26:16,125
We've really messed this up, didn't we?
470
00:26:19,125 --> 00:26:20,125
Pretty much, yeah.
471
00:26:20,208 --> 00:26:23,000
We just have so much baggage.
472
00:26:23,959 --> 00:26:25,583
I wish we could start over.
473
00:26:29,208 --> 00:26:30,875
Can we start over?
474
00:26:39,792 --> 00:26:40,792
[sighs]
475
00:26:45,291 --> 00:26:46,709
[cell phone ringing]
476
00:26:53,083 --> 00:26:54,041
[beep]
477
00:26:54,125 --> 00:26:55,291
Hello?
478
00:26:56,083 --> 00:26:58,333
[Jackson] Hi. Is Susan Mayer there?
479
00:27:03,208 --> 00:27:04,709
May I ask who's calling?
480
00:27:05,375 --> 00:27:08,041
This is Jackson Braddock.
481
00:27:08,125 --> 00:27:11,125
Uh, we met once. I don't know
if you remember me. I have brown hair.
482
00:27:11,208 --> 00:27:13,667
Uh, yeah. I think I remember you.
483
00:27:13,750 --> 00:27:16,000
Well, anyway, I thought we really clicked,
484
00:27:16,083 --> 00:27:18,917
so I was wondering if you might want
to have dinner with me.
485
00:27:20,208 --> 00:27:22,500
Okay. When?
486
00:27:23,000 --> 00:27:26,083
Tomorrow? I know this great Mexican...
487
00:27:26,166 --> 00:27:27,250
[clears throat]
488
00:27:27,333 --> 00:27:28,792
French place.
489
00:27:28,875 --> 00:27:32,083
Sounds great. Pick me up at 7:00.
490
00:27:32,750 --> 00:27:35,166
Great. Where do you live?
491
00:27:35,250 --> 00:27:37,250
[laughs]
492
00:27:45,083 --> 00:27:47,208
[knocking at door]
493
00:27:49,041 --> 00:27:51,792
May I help you? Excuse me!
494
00:27:52,166 --> 00:27:56,333
I am Gabrielle Solis.
Perhaps you know my husband.
495
00:27:56,417 --> 00:27:59,458
He "rubs" your boss. Where are they?
496
00:27:59,542 --> 00:28:03,709
I am under strict instructions
not to disturb Mrs. Hildebrand.
497
00:28:03,792 --> 00:28:06,417
-You can wait here.
-Fine.
498
00:28:09,917 --> 00:28:13,500
But when the cops bust up this brothel,
I'm gonna tell them you're the madame.
499
00:28:14,667 --> 00:28:15,834
[sighs]
500
00:28:21,500 --> 00:28:22,959
[Virginia moaning]
501
00:28:23,041 --> 00:28:25,625
Yes, that's it. Right there.
502
00:28:27,417 --> 00:28:29,041
You sure this isn't too rough?
503
00:28:29,125 --> 00:28:33,083
[Virginia] Mmm. No way.
Go deeper. I can take it.
504
00:28:36,041 --> 00:28:38,542
[moaning continues]
505
00:28:46,417 --> 00:28:49,709
Hold on. I've got a crick...
506
00:28:55,417 --> 00:29:00,333
Carlos, I just remembered I have
an important business call to make.
507
00:29:02,458 --> 00:29:04,000
Could you give me the room for a minute?
508
00:29:04,083 --> 00:29:05,417
Absolutely.
509
00:29:14,750 --> 00:29:17,041
Mrs. Solis, what are you doing here?
510
00:29:17,750 --> 00:29:20,041
I know what you've been up to,
and shame on you!
511
00:29:20,625 --> 00:29:23,625
-What are you talking about?
-I know about the big "O."
512
00:29:25,417 --> 00:29:29,709
Oh, dear. He could tell?
I'm beyond mortified.
513
00:29:30,750 --> 00:29:32,166
I understand your concern,
514
00:29:32,250 --> 00:29:34,500
but I assure you,
it was only that one time.
515
00:29:34,583 --> 00:29:36,959
-It's never happened again.
-And it never will.
516
00:29:37,041 --> 00:29:41,041
Because if you think I'm gonna let you
drag Carlos off to Europe, you're nuts.
517
00:29:41,125 --> 00:29:43,959
I suppose I should be flattered
that a woman as young
518
00:29:44,041 --> 00:29:46,917
and beautiful as you
should see me as a threat.
519
00:29:47,875 --> 00:29:49,875
But it would be a shame
to let it end a friendship
520
00:29:49,959 --> 00:29:52,041
that's come to mean so much to me.
521
00:29:52,625 --> 00:29:54,041
Maybe a little too much.
522
00:29:54,500 --> 00:29:58,208
Mrs. Solis, my husband's gone.
I'm estranged from my family.
523
00:29:58,667 --> 00:30:01,834
If you live with loneliness long enough,
it becomes an ache inside you,
524
00:30:01,917 --> 00:30:03,917
an actual, physical pain.
525
00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:06,542
I thought I'd live with that pain
the rest of my life.
526
00:30:06,625 --> 00:30:08,667
Then your husband healed me.
527
00:30:09,125 --> 00:30:11,291
Can you blame me for being grateful?
528
00:30:13,542 --> 00:30:18,041
No, but I just think we should
end things before they get any weirder.
529
00:30:19,792 --> 00:30:22,208
Carlos tells me you used
to be a fashion model.
530
00:30:23,583 --> 00:30:25,667
I've always had a passion for clothes.
531
00:30:26,166 --> 00:30:27,375
The reason I'm going to Europe
532
00:30:27,458 --> 00:30:30,125
is to see the couture collections
in Paris and Milan.
533
00:30:31,375 --> 00:30:32,542
Lucky you.
534
00:30:33,500 --> 00:30:35,917
It's not so much fun going alone,
535
00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:40,667
but if I had a knowledgeable
companion like you to be my guide...
536
00:30:42,417 --> 00:30:44,834
In fact, you could be my personal shopper.
537
00:30:45,333 --> 00:30:49,291
[laughs] That is, if you don't mind
being paid in dresses.
538
00:30:52,083 --> 00:30:56,125
Gosh, that's a hell of a sweet offer,
539
00:30:56,208 --> 00:30:59,834
but I've got the girls and, um...
540
00:30:59,917 --> 00:31:01,417
We'll bring them along.
541
00:31:01,500 --> 00:31:04,500
Think what fun we'll have
dressing them up!
542
00:31:07,750 --> 00:31:10,542
What the hell! You're never too young
to see Paris, right?
543
00:31:10,625 --> 00:31:15,834
I'm so glad. I can see
we're going to be great friends.
544
00:31:17,500 --> 00:31:20,000
Carlos, I'm done with my call.
545
00:31:26,083 --> 00:31:27,208
[mouths] Bye.
546
00:31:36,792 --> 00:31:37,959
-[Edie] Hello!
-Mmm!
547
00:31:39,542 --> 00:31:41,250
Hey, hon. Check this out.
548
00:31:41,959 --> 00:31:44,458
If it's the cat eating spaghetti,
I've already seen it.
549
00:31:44,542 --> 00:31:46,000
It's our band logo.
550
00:31:46,083 --> 00:31:47,750
We're thinking
of getting T-shirts made up.
551
00:31:49,125 --> 00:31:51,750
"Blue Odyssey"? Who came up with that?
552
00:31:51,834 --> 00:31:54,458
This was the name of my brother's
band when he was in high school.
553
00:31:55,583 --> 00:31:56,834
You have a brother?
554
00:31:59,041 --> 00:32:00,583
Had. He died.
555
00:32:03,458 --> 00:32:05,834
Well, you never told me about him.
556
00:32:07,291 --> 00:32:08,291
What happened?
557
00:32:11,750 --> 00:32:15,583
His name was Steve,
and he was a great guy.
558
00:32:16,834 --> 00:32:19,625
Just kind of got caught up in drugs
and couldn't get out.
559
00:32:21,542 --> 00:32:23,417
He went to prison, and when he was there
560
00:32:24,208 --> 00:32:26,583
he was killed by another inmate.
561
00:32:27,875 --> 00:32:29,625
What happened to the guy who killed him?
562
00:32:29,709 --> 00:32:32,166
Oh, the court ruled it self-defense,
563
00:32:32,792 --> 00:32:34,709
so the guy finished his time
and he got out.
564
00:32:36,417 --> 00:32:38,875
I can't believe
you've never told me about him.
565
00:32:40,750 --> 00:32:44,333
I mean, it might help you
to talk about stuff like that.
566
00:32:47,667 --> 00:32:49,500
I have my own way of dealing with it.
567
00:32:53,166 --> 00:32:57,291
Sorry I'm late, but rehearsal was awesome.
568
00:32:57,375 --> 00:33:00,291
They're letting me sing lead vocal
on Hotel California.
569
00:33:01,000 --> 00:33:02,083
That's nice.
570
00:33:02,166 --> 00:33:04,750
Hey, was there a blue convertible
parked in front of Katherine's?
571
00:33:04,834 --> 00:33:06,583
Yes, there was. Nice one.
572
00:33:06,667 --> 00:33:09,208
-Oh, my God, he's still there!
-Who's still there?
573
00:33:09,291 --> 00:33:11,291
Well, Katherine's been lonely,
so I set her up with a client.
574
00:33:11,375 --> 00:33:14,875
And he's been there for over
four hours, so you know it's going well.
575
00:33:14,959 --> 00:33:18,041
Good for you, my clever little matchmaker.
576
00:33:18,625 --> 00:33:20,041
Well, you deserve some credit, too.
577
00:33:20,125 --> 00:33:21,917
I mean, you brought us Peter's business.
578
00:33:22,750 --> 00:33:26,959
-Peter? Peter Hickey?
-Yes.
579
00:33:27,041 --> 00:33:28,208
You set him up with Katherine?
580
00:33:28,291 --> 00:33:31,083
-Is that bad?
-Potentially.
581
00:33:31,166 --> 00:33:36,250
Is he gay? Ugh, I knew he had
too much product in his hair.
582
00:33:36,333 --> 00:33:38,917
No, it's just that when I booked
the anniversary party,
583
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:41,041
I didn't want you to be uncomfortable
around Peter,
584
00:33:41,125 --> 00:33:44,250
so I said we'd met in college,
which is not actually the case.
585
00:33:44,333 --> 00:33:46,917
-Well, where did you meet?
-Prison.
586
00:33:48,375 --> 00:33:53,125
Peter's a felon?
But he's so refined, so handsome.
587
00:33:53,208 --> 00:33:55,875
Two qualities that
did not serve him well behind bars.
588
00:33:55,959 --> 00:33:57,750
My God, Orson.
What kind of criminal is he?
589
00:33:57,834 --> 00:34:01,166
-A killer? A rapist?
-Oh, no, no. Nothing like that.
590
00:34:01,917 --> 00:34:04,417
-They got him for organ trafficking.
-What?
591
00:34:04,500 --> 00:34:07,750
He was a surgeon, and it seems that
when the opportunity presented itself,
592
00:34:07,834 --> 00:34:11,542
he'd harvest the odd liver
or kidney from a deceased patient,
593
00:34:11,625 --> 00:34:13,458
and then sell it on the black market.
594
00:34:13,542 --> 00:34:16,667
Are you telling me that I set Katherine up
with a convicted grave robber?
595
00:34:16,750 --> 00:34:19,583
Well, you've said yourself,
women over 40 can only be so choosy.
596
00:34:19,667 --> 00:34:22,792
That is not funny!
I have to go warn Katherine.
597
00:34:28,500 --> 00:34:30,291
[line ringing]
598
00:34:30,500 --> 00:34:32,250
-[Katherine] [whispering] Hello?
-Katherine, hi.
599
00:34:32,333 --> 00:34:36,250
-Is everything all right over there?
-Yes. Everything's fine.
600
00:34:37,208 --> 00:34:38,625
Then why are you whispering?
601
00:34:42,333 --> 00:34:44,959
Peter just fell asleep.
I don't want to wake him.
602
00:34:45,041 --> 00:34:48,208
Oh, my God. You slept with him?
603
00:34:49,959 --> 00:34:52,333
You can wag that finger all you like.
604
00:34:52,417 --> 00:34:55,542
I've got just six words for you,
Bree Hodge.
605
00:34:57,458 --> 00:34:58,792
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
606
00:34:59,291 --> 00:35:02,500
Oh, I just really wish
you'd taken things more slowly.
607
00:35:02,959 --> 00:35:04,709
Bree, you have given me
608
00:35:04,792 --> 00:35:07,709
the most magical night
I've had since I don't know when.
609
00:35:07,792 --> 00:35:09,250
Are you going to make me feel bad
about it now?
610
00:35:10,542 --> 00:35:11,667
No. I'm not.
611
00:35:12,792 --> 00:35:16,458
Oh, he's just so wonderful.
612
00:35:16,542 --> 00:35:20,083
I tell you, if I'm not careful,
this guy could steal my heart.
613
00:35:21,083 --> 00:35:24,125
Well, if he tries,
just promise you'll call.
614
00:35:25,834 --> 00:35:27,000
What?
615
00:35:30,709 --> 00:35:32,250
[Katherine] Sorry I'm late.
616
00:35:32,333 --> 00:35:36,792
I was sleeping so soundly,
and Peter didn't want to wake me.
617
00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:40,583
-What's this?
-A Cosmopolitan.
618
00:35:40,667 --> 00:35:42,291
That's your favorite, isn't it?
619
00:35:42,375 --> 00:35:44,583
It's 10:00 a.m. I don't want a drink.
620
00:35:44,667 --> 00:35:47,041
[sighs] You will.
621
00:35:48,500 --> 00:35:50,083
[Katherine sniffling]
622
00:35:50,750 --> 00:35:54,125
But these homeless people
whose kidneys he bought,
623
00:35:54,208 --> 00:35:56,458
he at least paid them well, right?
624
00:35:57,917 --> 00:36:01,166
[groans] I am so, so sorry.
625
00:36:01,250 --> 00:36:03,250
[crying] It's not your fault.
You didn't know.
626
00:36:03,333 --> 00:36:07,583
I have no one
but myself to blame. [sobbing]
627
00:36:07,917 --> 00:36:09,959
That's it. I'm going to Maryland.
628
00:36:10,041 --> 00:36:13,250
You can't just move
because of one bad date.
629
00:36:13,333 --> 00:36:15,125
You don't get it.
630
00:36:15,583 --> 00:36:19,875
When we started this,
you were just as lonely as I was.
631
00:36:19,959 --> 00:36:22,709
Orson in jail, Benji gone,
632
00:36:22,792 --> 00:36:24,333
and I felt bad for you,
633
00:36:24,417 --> 00:36:26,834
but, boy, was it nice
to have somebody in the same boat.
634
00:36:27,417 --> 00:36:31,250
Then Orson got out,
and now he's here all the time,
635
00:36:31,333 --> 00:36:36,875
and I feel like you're this fun,
happy power couple,
636
00:36:37,458 --> 00:36:41,291
and I'm just this needy, pathetic idiot
637
00:36:41,375 --> 00:36:47,000
who hops into bed with the first
pancreas thief who kisses her!
638
00:36:47,375 --> 00:36:49,166
[sobbing continues]
639
00:36:53,250 --> 00:36:56,875
-I should be with family.
-And I'm not family?
640
00:37:00,875 --> 00:37:03,750
Katherine, all my life I wanted a sister,
641
00:37:04,709 --> 00:37:07,375
and now I feel like I finally have one.
642
00:37:08,458 --> 00:37:11,792
But we're always fighting
and competing with each other.
643
00:37:12,917 --> 00:37:15,417
Well, what could be more sisterly
than that?
644
00:37:17,792 --> 00:37:19,333
I know I'm not the most...
645
00:37:22,083 --> 00:37:25,834
...demonstrative person,
but I care about you deeply.
646
00:37:25,917 --> 00:37:29,083
And if you were
to just walk out of my life,
647
00:37:29,166 --> 00:37:33,250
I would be very, very unhappy.
648
00:37:36,041 --> 00:37:39,583
-Well, I wouldn't want that.
-Good.
649
00:37:40,625 --> 00:37:41,917
[both laughing]
650
00:37:44,458 --> 00:37:45,959
Well, now that that's settled,
651
00:37:46,041 --> 00:37:48,125
-let's make some pies.
-Okay.
652
00:37:52,500 --> 00:37:54,875
-Can I have another Cosmo?
-No.
653
00:37:59,333 --> 00:38:01,166
Hey, is Porter still at Kirby's?
654
00:38:01,667 --> 00:38:04,709
Yeah. What's wrong with you?
You've been antsy all night.
655
00:38:04,792 --> 00:38:07,458
Nothing, no, I'm fine. I'm fine.
656
00:38:08,291 --> 00:38:09,417
[door closes]
657
00:38:10,667 --> 00:38:13,041
Okay, I know what it is.
658
00:38:13,125 --> 00:38:16,208
I've had this nagging feeling
that I've forgotten something,
659
00:38:16,291 --> 00:38:20,458
and then I just realized, I think
I left the freezer door at Scavo's open.
660
00:38:20,542 --> 00:38:22,375
-You sure?
-No.
661
00:38:23,125 --> 00:38:26,625
That's why it's gonna drive me crazy.
I'd better go down there and check.
662
00:38:26,709 --> 00:38:29,542
Okay. Hurry back.
663
00:38:40,083 --> 00:38:44,208
I'm so glad you were able to get away.
I didn't think you'd make it.
664
00:38:45,875 --> 00:38:49,875
Yeah, I'm glad my parents still think
I'm young enough for sleepovers.
665
00:38:49,959 --> 00:38:50,959
[car door slams]
666
00:38:55,125 --> 00:38:57,375
Crap! It's my dad!
667
00:39:04,625 --> 00:39:06,375
Dad, hi. I was just...
668
00:39:07,583 --> 00:39:09,333
I know what you were "just."
669
00:39:12,834 --> 00:39:14,375
When I found this I thought,
670
00:39:14,458 --> 00:39:17,500
"Oh, great, one of the guys in the band
is having an affair."
671
00:39:17,583 --> 00:39:21,208
And then it hit me, Porter has a key.
672
00:39:24,125 --> 00:39:25,667
Where is she?
673
00:39:26,291 --> 00:39:29,125
-Okay.
-Dad! Don't!
674
00:39:29,458 --> 00:39:31,000
She isn't wearing anything, all right?
675
00:39:33,125 --> 00:39:34,583
Who is she?
676
00:39:34,667 --> 00:39:37,333
Just some girl from English class.
You don't know her.
677
00:39:37,750 --> 00:39:38,792
I'm gonna go in the bathroom.
678
00:39:38,875 --> 00:39:41,041
You've got 60 seconds
to get her out of here.
679
00:39:46,166 --> 00:39:47,250
[sighs]
680
00:40:06,250 --> 00:40:09,500
Oh, hey, Mike.
Wow, look at you all dressed up.
681
00:40:09,875 --> 00:40:12,834
Yeah, I was kind of on a date.
682
00:40:14,000 --> 00:40:15,000
Oh!
683
00:40:15,083 --> 00:40:18,041
-How did it go?
-Pretty bad.
684
00:40:18,125 --> 00:40:20,125
Basically she just grilled me
all through dinner.
685
00:40:20,208 --> 00:40:22,792
What do I think about this?
What would I do if that?
686
00:40:22,875 --> 00:40:26,250
I barely even know her, and I felt
like I was on trial for my life.
687
00:40:26,333 --> 00:40:27,750
Oh, I'm sorry.
688
00:40:27,834 --> 00:40:29,959
I just wanted somebody nice
to have a cup of coffee with.
689
00:40:30,041 --> 00:40:32,000
I guess that's too much to ask.
690
00:40:32,500 --> 00:40:35,417
Well, it's kind of late for coffee, but...
691
00:40:36,792 --> 00:40:38,000
I do have lemonade.
692
00:40:38,417 --> 00:40:39,917
I'd settle for lemonade.
693
00:40:48,417 --> 00:40:52,917
Hey, you know, I know it seems
like I am being hard on you,
694
00:40:53,000 --> 00:40:54,792
but, like I told you before,
695
00:40:54,875 --> 00:40:58,417
I don't think
that you're emotionally ready for sex.
696
00:40:59,583 --> 00:41:01,667
I know what you said.
697
00:41:01,750 --> 00:41:03,542
Just making sure you heard me.
698
00:41:04,792 --> 00:41:08,375
-Now go to bed. It's late.
-Okay.
699
00:41:13,417 --> 00:41:16,417
Want me to put the car cover
on for you first?
700
00:41:16,500 --> 00:41:18,125
Sure. Thanks.
701
00:41:32,834 --> 00:41:35,625
You shouldn't be here.
Someone might recognize your car.
702
00:41:35,709 --> 00:41:38,000
-Is everything okay?
-Yeah.
703
00:41:38,083 --> 00:41:39,542
My dad doesn't suspect anything.
704
00:41:40,417 --> 00:41:42,166
I'm sorry if I got you in any trouble.
705
00:41:43,166 --> 00:41:45,458
It's okay. You're worth it.
706
00:41:47,917 --> 00:41:50,542
[Mary Alice] There are dangerous
women in this world.
707
00:41:52,083 --> 00:41:56,375
Some are lovers blind
to the consequences of their actions.
708
00:41:57,083 --> 00:41:58,583
[door closes]
709
00:41:59,250 --> 00:42:04,166
Some are wives enraged
by the betrayal of those they trusted.
710
00:42:04,625 --> 00:42:06,041
[zipping up]
711
00:42:09,083 --> 00:42:14,750
Others are predators deviously
setting traps to get what they want.
712
00:42:18,709 --> 00:42:21,542
If you are unlucky enough to come upon
713
00:42:21,625 --> 00:42:26,375
one of these dangerous creatures,
the safest thing to do...
714
00:42:26,458 --> 00:42:28,083
I pulled those records you asked for.
715
00:42:28,166 --> 00:42:30,875
Looks like your Mr. Williams
is keeping a little secret.
716
00:42:31,417 --> 00:42:34,458
...is run the other way.
717
00:42:38,792 --> 00:42:41,250
[theme music playing]
718
00:43:08,834 --> 00:43:10,750
[theme music ends]